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Culturally Competent Guide to Holidays in the Workplace
By Lizz Carroll - Dec 21, 2009
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Also read: holiday, Kwanzaa, celebration, etiquette

It's that time of year again. Coworkers are adding red and green to their business suits and their desks, others are bringing in baked sweets and bosses are planning the yearly soiree. But what about those in the office who don't celebrate Christmas? DiversityInc asked experts for advice on how to keep the corporate festivities respectful and fun for all.

Party Etiquette

It's always nice when your company throws an office-wide get-together before the holidays, but what should they call it so that it's inclusive to all invited?

"A 'holiday party' is an acceptable name for a seasonal event—it could reference Martin Luther King Day or Christmas or any other federal holiday a company recognizes," says Nancy Di Dia, Boehringer Ingelheim's executive director of diversity, inclusion and engagement.

While this may work in some offices, Joyce S. Dubensky, executive vice president and CEO of the Tanenbaum Center for Interreligious Understanding, advises a more conservative approach. "Many organizations opt for 'holiday party,' which sounds neutral but can still create problems," she says. "There are religions, like Jehovah's Witnesses, that don't celebrate any of the winter holidays. In fact, their faith bars them from observing."

For advice on how to develop religious cultural competency at work, visit DiversityIncBestPractices.com.

So what's the solution? "An alternative would be to create a name that's not specifically holiday-focused, like '2009 Company X Celebration.' Because the celebration is not based on the holidays, those who don't or can't celebrate any winter holidays are still included," says Dubensky.

Deck the Halls

You've been put in charge of decorating for the big event, so how do you create an environment that makes everyone feel comfortable?

"Keep decorating as seasonal as possible—use terms like 'Season's Greetings,' 'Looking Forward' and 'Best Wishes in the New Year.' If it stays focused on the new year, it also ties to business goals and the promise of having the opportunity to achieve or exceed goals in a new year," says Di Dia.

For Dubensky, teamwork and variety are key. She says, "One tactic we recommend is to put together a multi-faith team of employees to help you plan and coordinate the event. That way, you get diversity of views about the kind of party to throw."

She adds, "Different companies also have different cultures. A multi-faith, seasonal display of Christmas tree, menorah and a Kinara (the holder for Kwanzaa candles) mixed with generic winter-themed decorations may be completely acceptable for one company, while another may opt strictly for seasonal decorations (e.g., snowflakes, flower arrangements with seasonal flowers and berries), a themed party with related decorations (like a '50s party) or even no decorations at all."

To Go or Not to Go

If you don't celebrate these holidays and you feel uncomfortable attending the office party, is it OK to excuse yourself? It's really up to you, says Di Dia. "Employees have choices in what they choose to attend or participate in at their companies. I believe it's a very personal choice for individuals to make and the amount of time they decide to stay is applicable to the particular culture. What's most important is to be sure the person who invited you or host knows you're attending or unable to attend. These are just professional courtesies and should not change at holiday time," she says. 

Gift-Giving

You love giving gifts to others during this season, even if it's just a gesture, but how do you give presents to those who don't share the same faith as you? Dubensky advises to give "joyfully and with a spirit of goodwill," but make sure you remain respectful. "Of course, any gifts should not involve religious elements that may be experienced as coercive or proselytizing—because that could turn the gift into an unwelcome happening. It is best to avoid gifts with explicit references to your religious beliefs," she says.

Greetings

It's nice to send best wishes to coworkers, but what's the best way to be warm as well as considerate? "Providing personalized holiday greetings is a lovely gesture if you know the faith of the person in question and that they're celebrating the holiday. If you wish a Happy Hanukkah to a non-practicing Jew, your colleague may feel that you're assuming too much about how s/he celebrates the holiday—which you are," says Dubensky.

She adds, "If you do choose to offer personalized holiday greetings, Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa and Blessed Eid (if it falls in December) are the appropriate greetings. Many card stores now offer these options during the holiday season."

For more information on how to have a religiously inclusive workplace, visit DiversityIncBestPractices.com.

Your opinions and thoughts...
Posted Thursday Dec 17, 2009 by Guest;
So, is there any tasteful way to tell my boss that I would rather not receive her "gift" of an annual donation to a religious charity in my name?.
Posted Thursday Dec 17, 2009 by Guest;
While there are many that do not celebrate ALL holidays or even SOME holidays, there are many that do. It would be inappropriate to ignore something so important to an individual as the Holiday season. Religious beliefs are part of our very being. Let's keep the holiday gatherings, but also keep them simple and not extravagant. .
Posted Thursday Dec 17, 2009 by Guest;
I can tell you that, if you work in a company where the staff predominantly celebrates any holiday but Christmas, they aren't going to be mindful of a Christian person's or a secular person's discomfort with their holiday displays and activities. I'm tired of being told that MY beliefs are the only ones that have to be supressed. My company sponsored several activities related to Halloween, which I do not acknowledge as a Holiday, but.... well, I could rant a lot here, but I think I'm just going to go shopping my coworkers... maybe little music boxes that play "Jesus Loves Me.".
Posted Thursday Dec 17, 2009 by Guest;
First, the assumption that every holiday 'event' must include everyone's religion is a false one. The 'holiday event' should be a mutually respectful 'fair' acknowledging the various belief systems that have a Winter/December holiday. If you don't believe, or don't agree, accept the fact that you have chosen a different path and don't participate: enough with making people feel bad for not having all-inclusive, offend-no-one, un-specific belief systems. .
Posted Thursday Dec 17, 2009 by Guest;
I am completely nondenominational and I am so tired of Christians whining about Jesus being taken out of Christmas, and bemoaning the fact that people say Happy Holidays, etc. The point here is that "Happy Holidays" is supposed to be INCLUSIVE of everyone. How would you like it if everyone wished you "Happy Kwanza" or "Happy Hanukkah" when it is not appropriate to you? If you want Jesus in your Christmas, by all means have your Nativity scene at home. Why can't people just shut up and worship their own way by themselves instead of shoving in eveyone else's face all the time? School, Goverment and the workplace should be kept free of religion. The right of freedom of religion also means the right to be free FROM religion..
Posted Thursday Dec 17, 2009 by Guest;
Honestly people just want to be unhappy and make things in the workplace even more unhappy for others. The 'December wars" never came about until after 9/11 when bigotry was allowed to come back to the forefront of socieety. People who now want to claim to be so religious and that December is only about Christmas in it's religious sense were previously only focused d on the secular commericalism of it and continue to prove that such is all they are really focused on by all the bickering and the faking disbelief that there are actually people who don't celebrate Christmas especially if they have children. Hanukkah which isn't even a major Jewish holiday has been transformed into one designed to rival the secular nature of Christmas instead of focusing on it's significance to the people. As to the suggestion of not attending if you don't celebrate the holidays; it's not likely to go unnoticed and is often held against the individual. As a Muslim I've been forced to attend office holiday gatherings in December and actively participate in the planning of it because it's about being a team player. I've known of an employee who tragically lost a child on Christmas and so lost all passion for it still being forced to attend the office gatherings as well; talk about lack of compassion. if only days of significance would be recognized in their proper time of the year then people could have all their Christmassy stuff..
Posted Thursday Dec 17, 2009 by Guest;
Some have posted comments to this article suggesting that the greeting "Happy Holiday's" somehow devalues Christmas. I would like to suggest that to wish someone a "Merry Christmas" when you don't know if they are a Christian is offensive. Might the fact that Christmas is a state holiday in the US led to it's devaluation as an important Christian holiday. I think that a solution is that employers could give vouchers for a holiday of choice be taken. I would gladly work Christmas, if someone would cover for me on say, Passover I presently have to use vacation time to take my holidays off. This is favoritism to one faith, while ignoring the faith (or not) of others. What happened to separation of church and state? With that, Happy Holiday (which ever you celebrate) to one and all, and best wishes in the 2010! We are all important enough to be recognized for who we are.
Posted Thursday Dec 17, 2009 by Guest;
I finally worked up the courage to tell our party planning committee (after much hounding about why I didn't attend every year) that I was not comfortable with a Christmas themed celebration and that was the reason I didn't attend our annual event. I didn't have the intention of them changing the event, just to explain my absence and diffuse the constant barrage of pressure to attend. I am used to being excluded because of my faith, which I don't advertise in the workplace, and I don't expect others to change because of me. I just excuse myself when I am not comfortable with a religious function and while I miss out from time to time, and that does disappoint me, it is my choice and I don't insist that others conform to me. With a separate company push toward diversity and inclusion, however, they renamed the annual Xmas party to an End of Year Celebration and were at pains to tell me it was because of me that it had changed, so I felt obligated to attend - and I have to admit, grateful and excited to finally be able to attend my first work party and to celebrate the shared achievements of the year over a meal. However, when I arrived, the room was decorated with Christmas decorations, reindeer, Santa Claus, a huge Christmas tree and Christmas crackers at every setting. Only the name of the party on the invitations had changed. I was more upset at this turn of events than I have ever felt about being excluded, because I felt as though I had been lured and duped into celebrating Christmas, which is against my faith. I sat down to have the meal, but literally could not eat because of the lump in my throat. I felt sick in my heart and had to leave before the meal was served because I felt so uncomfortable and upset. I was embarrassed to leave but too upset to stay. I also felt hurt: I felt like a fool for being excited about the party, and stupid for believing they had really thought about my feelings. I felt even worse for bringing along my partner, who also shares my beliefs, and putting my partner in a situation they were not comfortable with. I have never been offended in the past when my workplace had Christmas celebrations and I missed out, because I understand my beliefs are not mainstream and I don't ask others to conform to me, I simply excuse myself. I WAS offended at the thinly disguised Christmas party, which asked me to compromise my beliefs by being present. I felt tricked. I felt that they did not care about my feelings and the underlying spirit behind Diversity and Inclusion initiatives. I felt that they just wanted to check a box to give the pretence of inclusion and feel good about themselves and pat each other on the back, but really didn't want to change anything at all. They didn't think about WHY I wasn't at the previous Xmas functions, they just wanted to provide me with a loophole, not understanding that it wasn't only the name of the party but it's nature that was the problem. I wanted to share my story to say: If you're going to celebrate Christmas, or any other religious holiday at a work function, do it and say it. If you're going to have a non-religious or secular celebration, do it and say it. But for heaven's sake...call a spade a spade so that those with other faiths and beliefs or non-believers don't have to feel uncomfortable or offended when they arrive and it is not as advertised. Manage expectations. Don't pressure people to attend. Allow people to preserve their consciences by choosing not to attend if it is really a holiday celebration in the guise of an end of year celebration. .
Posted Thursday Dec 17, 2009 by Guest;
Postscript to the above comment: Having thought about this more, I now feel more strongly about this than I have prior to this experience: that inclusion is important and that workplace celebrations should not be about religion (or politics), unless your workplace is BASED on religion or politics (e.g. if you work in a church or for a Senator). I'm tired of saying, "Oh don't worry about me and what I think" and just excusing myself from things and missing out all the time... I'm starting to feel that my opinion and feelings DO matter just as much as anyone else. And that if I feel this way, others must feel this way, too. And perhaps I should stand up for myself so that others who are coming behind me don't have to go through the same issues. If you think about it, you might come to the conclusion that the annual corporate celebration is not about Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza or Eid. Isn't it really to say "thank you" for a year of hard work, to mark the passing of the years, and to celebrate your shared connections across the workforce, to celebrate life? Why should it exclude people? And aren't you watering down the "thank you" and focus on achievements by making it about something else? If you observe Christmas, I don't say you shouldn't celebrate it. I'm glad you have it and (as I'm told) that you feel closer to your families and feel happier at that time and you should celebrate it however you want to, and worship the way you want to, out of the office. I hope you enjoy it and that the season brings you everything you wish for. No one is taking Christmas away from you because the corporate party is not themed such. However... you ARE taking something away from me - and others - by theming the corporate party about Christmas. You are asking me to worship in the way that you worship. You are taking away my chance to look you in the eye in an environment I am comfortable in... to say "thank you" for being there for me over the past year, to celebrate our shared friendship and goals and achievements and the opportunity to be thanked and acknowledged. You don't need to be any religion to be my friend, my co-worker and to be respected by me. I don't care what your religion, belief system, ethnicity, gender or sexual orientation is: in fact, I welcome diverging opinions and respect people who challenge the status quo. I don't need to agree with you to work with you or be your friend. I think the moral of the story is - please - don't display TOKEN diversity and inclusion. Either do it, or not. I think this is a lesson we can learn, not just about holiday celebrations, but also about any D&I initiative toward people of colour, GLBT, gender, etc. What is the real reason we are enacting this initiative? Are we concerned with creating an environment where everyone is respected? Are we asking "WHY" we are doing this? Do we believe it? Is it underpinned with a spirit of understanding, love and mutual respect? Or is it just to check the box?.
Posted Friday Dec 18, 2009 by Guest;
Political correctness should not be taken too far..
Posted Friday Dec 18, 2009 by Guest;
I actively support diversity and inclusion, but dislike the recommendations for suppressing beliefs. I thought inclusion meant that everyone should feel included... not that people should feel that they are no longer free to show any part of their personal selves. Perhaps that is why there is still resistance to diversity and inclusion efforts? While I am a Christian, I don't take offense when my friends wish me a Happy Hanukkah... because it is simply their way of wishing me happiness and prosperity... regardless of religion. Shouldn't we be asking people to keep an open mind about other's beliefs instead of asking people to suppress themselves?.
Posted Friday Dec 18, 2009 by Guest;
I can tell you this much I have lived in many parts of the world and have friends of many different religions and belief systems. Not one time did I ever worry about how they celebrated a particular event. I have been to a southeast asian events where they killed a goat to honor spirits, I have been to Jewish events that were different than how I celebrated, I have celebrated events with Muslims friends that praised Allah and not one time did I feel I should not be there or in some way I was excluded. I shared the uniquness of the events and learned much about the culture. Get over the your self importance, learn to appreciate the world we live in, and accept those for who they are without feeling some threat to your own narrow minded idealistc viewpoint. If you don't like something quit making everyone change to accept your views or lack of, and go away. .
Posted Friday Dec 18, 2009 by Guest;
Well, Jehovah's Witnesses do not celebrate man made holidays. There shouldn't be this hoopla about it though. Someone is making too big a deal about something. We are not offended by people wishing us happiness or merriment, but if we don't come back with the exact same words, don't be offended. M.
Posted Friday Dec 18, 2009 by Guest;
I agree with diversity education and an acceptance. I don't believe holiday celebrations of any sort have a place in the work environment. If people want to get together with any of their co-workers over a holiday, they can be invited to whatever events you are having at home for family and friends. Don't get me wrong - I love the holiday season and love to decorate, etc., - at home. I enjoy the activities and beliefs of many other cultures as well and have participated in local cultural events and celebrations and had a wonderful time. At no time did I ever feel my beliefs were threatened by someone else merely expressing their own. Where I work, we have a staff picnic in July celebrating the signing of the Americans with Disabilities Act which is actually relevant to to what we do at work. We invite family and clients and also take the opportunity to educate on accessibility and inclusion of people with disabilities. There can be many reasons and ways for co-workers to come together , celebrate and "bond." Why must there be this age old holiday argumentum ad nauseam..
Posted Saturday Dec 19, 2009 by Guest;
The solution is simple. December 21 is the birthday of the patron saint of Cultural Competence, Joseph Stalin. Wish your employees "Happy Birthday, St. Joseph" on that date. Fire the first to raise an objection, have the second arrested and the third one shot for being an enemy of the people. Next question?.
Posted Saturday Dec 19, 2009 by Guest;
As one who celebrates Festivus I find this article hurtful. Hannukah, Kwanza and Eid are mentioned but not my faith tradition. A good principle is that if all traditions can't be included, it is better to include none. This applies in the workplace as well. It may *feel* culturally competent to include all the "big faiths" rather than favoring just one (as was the norm in less culturally competent times). But if the more obscure faiths are excluded then you have merely traded one kind of exclusion for another. Therefore it is recommended that all references to any faith be avoided so that the holiday is stringently faith free. This is the only way to ensure that no one is offended or hurt or left out. Replacement holiday themes should focus on common goals or achievements, such as an uptick in second quarter profits or the addition of new parking on Level 4..
Posted Sunday Dec 20, 2009 by Guest;
Cross-posted an excerpt to Free Republic. Best comment there was by "Yardstick" who declared, "This reads like a parody." .
Posted Monday Dec 21, 2009 by Guest;
For those who seem to think that I, as a Christian, would be equally offended if someone wished me a Happy Hannukah or Happy Kwanzaa, let me assure you that that is not the case. I would be grateful that someone wanted to include me, if even thru this tiny gesture, in their own holiday celebration. Instead of getting offended because we celebrate different holidays, why can't we be happy for each other. If I tell someone Merry Christmas, Christian or not, I am merely wanting to include them, in some small way, in the joyous celebration of my holiday. Why is that offensive? Why do we have to make everything so generic? Why can't we just be happy for one another's holidays & celebrate all of them, instead of pretending to ignore all of them? I just don't understand why people get offended by being wished a happy greeting (whatever it is). Have a great day! and MERRY CHRISTMAS!.
Posted Monday Dec 21, 2009 by Guest;
Ah Solistice, the unmentionable holiday. Everyone is all to helpful to overlook this day. However, I am happy to see them since the tree, yule log and mentions of holly berries reflect Paganism, not Christianity. Im sure we are missing about 100 other smaller, less commerical religions in this list as well. But ya know what? It takes more effort to get offended than to look at it this way. Millions of people act better in December due to their own religios beliefs. They donate to more charities, they laugh more and more quickly. Who am I to squelsh anyone's happiness because I wear my own beliefs like a tattered flag on my sleeve? Plus, I get a much needed business break and holiday pay. I think people have spent too much time in anger than trying to build a better place. You cant build happiness when it stems from hate..
Posted Tuesday Dec 22, 2009 by Guest;
I too would like to say as one of Jehovah's Witnesses that we do not in any way feel left out when others in the office are celebrating holidays as this is a choice we have made after careful consideration. Because we do not celebrate Christmas some wonder if we believe in Jesus Christ. The answer is most certainly yes, So if you wonder why we don't celebrate Christmas or the other holidays please feel free to ask us and we will be glad to explain it to you..
Posted Tuesday Dec 22, 2009 by Guest;
I just returned from the Middle East and I find it so ironic that my Muslim friends go out of their way to wish me a Merry Christmas each year. I come home to America and get "Happy Holidays" because people are afraid of being politically incorrect. Whenever I hear "Happy Holidays" I exercise my first amendment right to free speech and say "Merry Christmas". It is amazing to see so many peoples faces light up as they joyfully return my "Merry Christmas". .
Posted Tuesday Dec 22, 2009 by Guest;
I have a simple (and, in my opinion, obvious) question nobody at DiversityInc seems to have considered. If "diversity" robs me and mine of our cherished traditions and denigrates our heritage then isn't it really hate?.
Posted Tuesday Dec 22, 2009 by Guest;
First off, Happy St Josephs birthday everyone. This article would have been hilarious if it doesn't now represent how deep the Orwellian PC thought-control has penetrated the Corporate world. Let's be honest--multiculturalism, inclusiveness, and the Right "not-to-be-offended" are State religions in Western Society. It pains me to see the angst and effort extended to remove Christmas--with the exception of the most watered-down, commercial elements--from the corporate world in particular, and our society in general. That someone took the time and effort to write this stuff is just so wrong. Scary stuff. How about we do nothing, say nothing, think nothing--then no one would get offended. We can exchange empty boxes, empty stares, and feel good that no one--especially ME--wasn't offended. Sound fun? What I find offensive is that the corporate world, in an effort of political correctness, has embraced Kwanzaa. This is a joke holiday created in the 1960's by some black activist. It has zero credibility, no historical truth and actually a strongly racist historical undertone. Companies recognize Kwanzaa for appearance purposes only. That's offensive, that's racist..
Posted Tuesday Dec 22, 2009 by Guest;
How would you like it if everyone wished you "Happy Kwanza" or "Happy Hanukkah" when it is not appropriate to you? ******************************** I would love it...if they felt enough love for me to share their holiday I would be honored. Much better than whining about it...pfffft..
Posted Wednesday Dec 23, 2009 by Guest;
What ever happened to our inclusive american attitude, welcome all and respect all. Good will and love should never offend anyone. These hyper touchy attitudes are brought to this country recently and are not American values, and usually why the adherents left there own counties in the first place. These comments generally reflect the uselessness of inappropriate fealty to values that are not what make this country the desired destination for the rest of the world. Balkenism is what we should be offend us..
Posted Wednesday Dec 23, 2009 by Guest;
""Keep decorating as seasonal as possible—use terms like 'Season's Greetings,' 'Looking Forward' and 'Best Wishes in the New Year.' If it stays focused on the new year, it also ties to business goals and the promise of having the opportunity to achieve or exceed goals in a new year," says Di Dia." Doesn't a celebration mentioning the New Year offend persons who do not use the Gregorian calendar? .
Posted Wednesday Dec 23, 2009 by Guest;
Merry Christmas to All!.
Posted Monday Dec 28, 2009 by Guest;
It always amazes me to hear members of the dominate culture say it wouldn't offend me if ...... . Of course not. You have not lived in the minority your whole life, and by definition have priveledge here. You might even think it is sweet or nice or novel to be included in another cultures holiday celebration. I just ask you to consider what it might be like for those in the religious minotrity, living with no escape from the "christmas cheer." Somehow it reminds me of the people who say, I don't have a prejudice bone in my body- or I am color blind. Do your work and imagine what it would be like to be in someone elses shoes. That is what diversity and inclusion are really about. .
Posted Tuesday Dec 29, 2009 by Guest;
Wow. Seriously? This is why we have all the war and strife in this world. I am not Jewish and I would not mind if someone wished me a Happy Hannukah, Merry Christmas, Happy Kwanzaa or whatever. It's just a way of wishing people joy and good wishes. Like if someone said "have a nice day" in Chinese to me. I wish people could just get over feeling outraged and offended. But I guess then they'd have nothing to go to war over. .
Posted Tuesday Dec 29, 2009 by Guest;
Merry Christmas everyone all over the world. Why should anyone, regardless of their religious beliefs have to apologize for speaking blessings and best wishes to others. I would not in any way be offended by anyone who want to share best wishes on their religious holiday. Let's not lose sight of the fact that long before there was a holiday, and befoer there was a country called the United States, people all over the world celebrated Christmas, and no one had a problem with it. We have become so politically correct that we deprive ourselves of our basic human and civil rights and liberties. Ironically, I have never had anyone come to me and express that I offended them by saying Merry Christmas. Where is all of this coming from? .
Posted Thursday Dec 31, 2009 by Guest;
Sometimes in trying so hard to be all inclusive we end up with exactly the opposite result. How about you be you, and I'll be me, and we'll both respect and except each other for exactly who we are. .

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